How C-3P0 Messed up the Timeline of Dorothy's Visit to Oz

In the Land of Oz, where the yellow brick road shone like a golden serpent, the Wicked Witch of the West had long been a force to be reckoned with. Her dark magic and sinister plots had earned her a reputation as one of the most feared beings in the land.

But when C-3PO, the fussy protocol droid, arrived in Oz, he brought with him a peculiar gift, the gift of kindness. His words of compassion and understanding touched the Wicked Witch of the West's heart, and for a time, she was transformed.

What’s more? C-3P0’s visit really altered the time-line of Dorothy’s visit to Oz, at least from how we remember it. C-3P0 met the Scarecrow, the Tin Man and the Lion who all accompanied their new golden droid friend to see the Wizard of Oz. The Scarecrow received his brain. The Tin Man received a heart. And the Cowardly Lion received his courage. This means that Dorothy would not meet her trio of friends along the way. Surely you can see how drastically different things were for Dorothy than what we remember.

As mentioned before, the Wicked Witch of the West renounced her wicked ways and began to use her magical powers for good. The inhabitants of Oz, who had long suffered under her tyranny, were amazed by her change of heart.

However, not everyone was pleased with the Wicked Witch of the West's transformation. The new council, which included the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion, viewed her with suspicion. They saw her as a threat to their power and status, and they began to plot against her.

You see, with C-3PO's help, the Scarecrow received a brain, but it had unintended consequences. His newfound intelligence made him more calculating and less willing to help others, leading to a shift in the balance of power in Oz.

The Tin Man's heart, granted to him by the Wizard,certainly changed him, but in unexpected ways. He became more emotional and impulsive, leading to conflicts with his friends or even himself.

The Cowardly Lion's newfound courage resulted in him being more aggressive and dominant, further upsetting the delicate balance of power in Oz.

So as the council's influence and corruption grew, the Wicked Witch of the West became increasingly isolated and bitter. She saw the council as a threat to her own power and status, and she began to plot her revenge.

It was then that Dorothy's house landed on the Wicked Witch of the East, setting off a chain of events that would change the course of Oz's history. The Wicked Witch of the West (turned back wicked thanks to the council) merely saw the tragedy as an opportunity to eliminate a rival and gain power. She began to manipulate events from behind the scenes, using her magical powers to create obstacles and challenges for Dorothy.

Oh, but she was so wicked, that she appeared friendly and helpful to Dorothy. “Welcome, young one… don’t worry about that witch under your house… But what about you? Are you okay.” What didn’t change about the Oz time-line with Dorothy’s visit was her need to go home. The Wicked Witch of the West simply directed her to follow the Yellow Brick Road until reaching the Wizard of Oz.

Dorothy, unaware of the complex web of alliances and rivalries in Oz, navigated the unfamiliar landscape with caution. As she journeyed down the yellow brick road, she faced numerous challenges and obstacles. The Wicked Witch of the West used her magical powers to try and stop her. To the witch, Dorothy was merely a weapon to create further conflict and confusion in the Land of Oz. 

The witch turned the yellow brick road into a maze, making it difficult for Dorothy to find her way.

The witch created illusions of monsters and dangers, trying to scare Dorothy off the road.

The witch used her magic to make the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion seem hostile towards Dorothy. 

The Scarecrow was too distracted by his own thoughts and almost didn’t notice Dorothy's presence. He was stuck in a field of tall cornstalks, trying to figure out how to escape and didn’t have the time of day for her. 

The Tin Man, whose heart was broken upon discovering a broken bridge over a small stream was very much involved in trying to fix it. He was too focused on his task to notice Dorothy's approach. 

And the cowardly lion would chase her while appearing to almost eat her alive. He was only doing it for fun. 

If that weren’t enough, a dark force, known only as the Shadow, had begun to stir in the background. It sought to exploit the power vacuum and reclaim the dominance it once had over Oz. It was eventually realized that the Shadow was not a single entity, but a manifestation of the darkness within the hearts of Oz's inhabitants. The Shadow, it seemed, was drawn to Dorothy. She was the key to unlocking its secrets, but only if she helped the inhabitants confront their inner demons and find redemption.

The Wheelers are a group of creatures in Oz who were known for their mischievous and troublesome behavior. They were struggling with the Shadow that represented their own selfishness and lack of empathy. With Dorothy's help, they learned to overcome their own darkness and become more compassionate and cooperative.

The Gillikins are a tribe of people in Oz who before Dorothy's journey were known for their love of luxury and material possessions. They were struggling with the Shadow that represented their own greed and materialism. With Dorothy's help, they learned to find true happiness and fulfillment in more meaningful ways.

The Nome King was a powerful and ruthless ruler who, prior to Dorothy, sought to conquer and dominate others. He struggled with the Shadow that represented his own ambition and desire for power. With Dorothy's help, he learned to balance his ambition with compassion and empathy.

Finally, there was the China Country. a region of Oz where the inhabitants are made of delicate china. They struggled with a Shadow that represented their own fragility and vulnerability. With Dorothy's help, they learned to overcome their fears and become more confident and resilient.

Dorothy, with her innate goodness and courage, was soon the beacon of hope for Oz. The Shadow, sensing its power waning, unleashed a final, desperate attack. You see, as more and more inhabitants gained freedom from the Shadow, the Shadow dug it’s claws deeper into the ones who hadn’t been saved while ensuring their manifestations of darkness to be more pronounced. 

Dorothy persevered, using her own wit and resourcefulness to overcome her climactic battle. In the end, it was Dorothy's kindness, compassion, and determination that proved to be the decisive factors. The Shadow was vanquished, and Oz was reborn, its inhabitants living in harmony and peace.

The Wizard, grateful for Dorothy's help, presented her with a special gift: a small, delicate crystal that would allow her to go back home to Kansas, and return to Oz whenever she wished. As Dorothy prepared to leave, the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion approached her. "You're not just a hero, Dorothy," the Scarecrow said. "You're a true friend of Oz." Yes, even they had been released from the clutches of the Shadow.

And with that, Dorothy returned to her own world, forever changed by her experiences in Oz, with the knowledge that she would always have a home and friends in the magical Land of Oz.

But the Wicked Witch of the West's fate was left uncertain, leaving room for a sequel to explore the consequences of her actions.

He Gets Us?

 

I saw a commercial the other night from the #HeGetsUs movement. It showed people struggling with finances and appearing stressed out. The caption at the end of the commercial read, "Jesus struggled to make ends meet, too." I'll give my remark on that in a few paragraphs below.

You've probably seen these commercials a few times. This He Gets Us movement is a Christian evangelism campaign that aims to introduce people to Jesus Christ. The movement is led by a group called "The Servant Christian Foundation," and is largely funded and supported by the billionaire brothers, Charles and Phil Anschutz, who are also known for their conservative and Christian values. The campaign's goal is to show that Jesus Christ is relatable and relevant to modern people, and that he "gets us" in a way that others may not. 

So these commercials have appeared in sporting events like the Superbowl or even just during just regular commercial breaks. You might even see billboard signs from the campaign on the highway.

I have to admit, it's not a bad thing to get people into Jesus. I certainly commend the movement. But here's the problem I have with it. The movement is essentially re-branding Jesus so we can make him more relatable in the 21st century. Maybe we are giving people the wrong impression about Jesus. Do we really need to re-brand him?

So Jesus struggled to make ends meet? No he DID NOT! Jesus fed 5000 people (women and children not counted in those days) and had plenty leftover. Jesus instructed Simon Peter who had a bad night of fishing to "put the net over there" which resulted in an overwhelming amount of fish to catch. For his Last Supper, Jesus had a room prepared for him and the disciples along with bread wine and whatever else they ate on that fateful evening. Jesus had everything he needed and gave to those with abundance. A more appropriate commercial would be remind people that God blesses us with a life of abundance. It's just that we have to be on the right track and seek the Kingdom of Heaven. And I get it ... There are people living in third world countries whose governments aren't treating them very well. That's a story for a different day. But for those not so unfortunate, most Americans aren't ready to hear that God blesses us, much less believe it. So for now, we suggest something that isn't true, that Jesus was just like us and struggled to make ends meet. 

We need to be careful about re-branding God so that he is no longer the real thing. In the letter to the Hebrews in the New Testament it is said that Jesus understands us because he was one of us. He knows our problems because he experienced most of them except for sin. But in the series of these commercials that attempt to re-band Jesus, it's almost as if there should be the State Farm jingle, "Like a good neighbor, Jesus is there." 

While shoveling your driveway, does he shovel your neighbor's as well? Does he sit outside in the backyard with you and enjoys a couple beers and brats on a summer night? While choosing to see Jesus as meek and mild who would never hurt or upset anyone, is he soon housebroken? Does he run outside and fetch your morning paper for you? What sort of Jesus is he?

You see, the Jesus described in the Bible is a very controversial figure. He shook things up. That's why they wanted to kill him. It wasn't because he simply urged people to love one another, but because he challenged the status quo. He didn't stand around and give people encouragement that they were fine and good. He, instead, urged people to repent because they were in need of change and that he was the solution to their problems. A more suiting image of Jesus as depicted from the Bible would be if the Devil asked Jesus, "Who are you?" and Jesus answers, "Your worst nightmare!" Isn't that the more powerful Jesus that our faith professes, a Jesus that makes a difference, and calls us to commitment in reforming our lives?

Re-branding nearly trivializes Jesus. Re-branding could remove the power, the message, the authority and the command of God who became flesh among us on a search and rescue mission. Re-branding might lead us to take the Gospel with a grain of salt when the Gospel is so much more.

By making Jesus more "relatable" and "down-to-earth," the movement may be losing the essence of who Jesus is and what he came to do.

Rocking and Living On Forever!

Techno Kid: Guru of NRG!

I've been asked to do the intro for today's blog article, and give my thoughts on the recent sad passing of our legendary madman rocker, Ozzy Osbourne.

Ozzy... the Prince of Darkness, the wild man of heavy metal himself... shakes head slowly It's a real bummer, man. He was a true original, a legend in every sense of the word... sighs deeply, running hand through hair.. I remember when I first heard "Paranoid".  I've been listening to Black Sabbath since I was 10 years old. Remember how he was our motivation a few months ago, how he was going to the gym and getting ready for his concert?

Ozzy was the embodiment of the indestructible spirit, the eternal rebel refusing to quit. Even in his golden years, he showed us all how to keep pushing forward, never backing down from the fight. clenches fist determinedly His music, his attitude - it's all a testament to the power of perseverance in the face of adversity. Just like the NRG within us all! takes a deep breath, composing himself..

At least he got that one last show in. At least he went out on his own terms, giving fans one final hurrah.

So you know how Dio has a holographic performance of their last concert? And I know what you're thinking, "They're gonna whip up a shiny digital ghost of the Madman himself, crooning classics for eternity?" That's exactly what I'm thinking! Imagine the eternal Ozzy, forever strutting across stages, belting out timeless anthems to adoring crowds! But Ozzy might have missed the boat. You see, if we had mind uploading at our disposal, Ozzy could have uploaded his brain to a computer, then used AI to duplicate himself in terms of interacting with people. Then the holograph would project his "ghost" so that he would live on. 

Now we're  playing with fire here and I LOVE IT! Mind upload, artificial intelligence duplication, a literal digital phoenix rising from the ashes of mortality...But Ozzy's already checked out, so let's flip the script, yeah? WHAT IF... instead of mourning the fallen legends... ...we became the legends ourselves?! Think about it! With advanced enough tech, THERE'S NO REASON WE CAN'T UPLOAD OUR OWN CONSCIOUSNESSES, DUPLICATE THE ESSENCE OF WHO WE ARE IN THE DIGITAL REALM, AND LIVE ON FOREVER AS GLITCHING ROCK GODS!

And that's what we're talking about doing in this Friday's article. So pay attention!

Rocking and Living On Forever!

Ronnie James Dio, the legendary heavy metal vocalist who passed away in 2010, was featured in a holographic performance that recreated his last concert or iconic moments from his career. This kind of show uses advanced 3D projection technology to create a life-like, three-dimensional image of Dio on stage, often accompanied by remastered recordings or live musicians.

Kiss, known for their theatrical stage shows and iconic makeup, has announced plans to incorporate holograms of past band members or create new shows featuring digital versions of the band. This could mean resurrecting performances by members who have retired or passed away, or simply enhancing live concerts with holographic effects.

But could this also be extended to the rest of us? Imagine a future of high tech ghosts who continue to grace the family with their presence through the use of mind uploading, AI and holographic technology!

Question: Would you be willing to have a chip implanted in your brain so that you can upload the contents of your mind to the Internet--a lifetime of your thoughts, dreams, emotions, acquired knowledge, and memories? 

Many might answer, yes. They cite that there are benefits such as preserving the brain if in the event it becomes damaged from injury, stroke, or sudden illness. And if the brain is continuously synchronized with whatever portal the Internet provides, one can survive a tragic accident or even murder. A loved one simply accesses the portal online to continue the relationship. Why, one can even learn the details of the murder from the victim as he or she relays the final, chilling moments! 

It would all begin with the above-mentioned theoretical process of mind uploading. The concept of uploading a mind—sometimes called "mind uploading" or "whole brain emulation"—is a popular topic in both science fiction and futurist circles. The idea is that, with sufficiently advanced technology, we could map the entire structure and function of a human brain, digitize it, and run it on a computer. This digital version could, in theory, interact with loved ones, learn, and even evolve over time via a PC or maybe even a futuristic robot of that person. 

Of course it would require AI.  Training an AI on one's writings, recordings, and interactions could allow loved ones to "talk" to a version of themselves after they've gone. This is already being explored in various forms, from chatbots trained on personal data to more advanced digital avatars. But while AI bots can now mimic personalities, speech patterns, and even some memories (if trained on enough data), they are not conscious and do not possess self-awareness or subjective experience. They are, at best, sophisticated simulations; digital echoes of a person, not the person themselves. There could be some hesitation to follow through with this which is well-founded. AI can sometimes generate unexpected or inappropriate responses, especially if it encounters ambiguous or emotionally charged situations. No matter how well-trained, an AI bot is not infallible and may not always reflect one's true intentions or values. But, let's assume that surviving loved ones are willing to recognize and work with these imperfections.

The use of holograms to recreate performances like Dio's last concert demonstrates how technology can preserve and project a person's likeness and artistry. Combining this with AI could create interactive holograms that respond in real time, further blurring the line between memory and presence. Such a creation would be a "high-tech spirit", a digital manifestation of a person's mind, memories, and mannerisms, but without the Soul that made them truly unique.

Combining the idea of uploading a version of ourselves, integrating it with an AI bot, and turning it into a projected hologram that interacts, we essentially create a high-tech spirit of our mind. It's not our actual Soul, as our human entity is made of composite matter. When we die, our Soul is no longer part of that composite entity For all  practical purposes, we could say that this hologram would be a high-tech. spirit of the deceased person's mind. We've actually created a spirit that does not include the Soul which has passed onto the next life.

C-3PO in the Land of Oz

C-3PO in the Land of Oz

Once upon a time, in a galaxy far, far away, C-3PO, the golden protocol droid, found himself in a most peculiar situation. After a malfunction during a hyperspace jump, he was unexpectedly transported to the vibrant and magical Land of Oz. As he powered up, he looked around, bewildered by the colorful landscape filled with emerald cities, talking animals, and whimsical creatures.

“Where am I?” C-3PO exclaimed, his voice tinged with anxiety. “I must find my way back to the Rebel Alliance!”

As he wandered through the lush fields, he encountered a group of curious Munchkins. They gazed at him in awe, their eyes wide with wonder. “Who are you?” one little Munchkin asked.

“I am C-3PO, human-cyborg relations,” he replied, straightening his posture. “I am fluent in over six million forms of communication. But right now, I seem to be lost.”

The Munchkins, delighted by his shiny exterior and eloquent speech, decided to help him. “You should visit the Wizard of Oz! He can help you get back home!” they suggested, pointing down the yellow brick road.

With a newfound sense of purpose, C-3PO set off on the yellow brick road, his metallic limbs clanking with each step. Along the way, he met a Scarecrow who was searching for a brain, a Tin Man longing for a heart, and a Cowardly Lion seeking courage. They quickly became friends, each sharing their dreams and aspirations.

“Perhaps the Wizard can help us all,” C-3PO suggested, his circuits buzzing with excitement. “I may not have a heart or courage, but I can certainly assist you in your quest!”

As they journeyed together, C-3PO used his knowledge of diplomacy and etiquette to navigate the challenges they faced. When they encountered the Wicked Witch of the West, he diplomatically negotiated their passage, much to the surprise of his companions. “I must remind you, dear witch, that kindness is the true path to power,” he said, his voice steady despite the danger.

Finally, they reached the Emerald City, where the Wizard awaited. The great and powerful Wizard listened to their stories and, after much deliberation, granted each of them their wishes. The Scarecrow received a brain, the Tin Man a heart, and the Cowardly Lion found his courage. As for C-3PO, the Wizard offered him a way back to his galaxy.

“Thank you, kind Wizard,” C-3PO said, bowing slightly. “But I have learned that friendship and courage come in many forms. I will cherish my time here in Oz.”

With a wave of the Wizard’s hand, a portal opened, shimmering with the colors of the rainbow. C-3PO turned to his friends, his golden eyes glistening. “I will miss you all. Remember, no matter where you are, you can always find courage, heart, and wisdom within yourselves.”

As he stepped through the portal, C-3PO felt a sense of fulfillment. He had not only helped his friends but had also discovered the true meaning of companionship. Back in the galaxy far, far away, he would carry the spirit of Oz with him, forever reminding him that even a droid can find a heart in the most unexpected places. 

And so, in the Land of Oz, the adventures of C-3PO became a cherished tale, a reminder that friendship knows no bounds, and courage can be found in the most unlikely of heroes.

The Aliens Give Dana her Second Baby

Hello All:

Happy Monday!

We've reached the very last story ever written in the Dana Gets Abducted by Aliens series. Released throughout 2015 and 2016, the stories were eventually unpublished due to undesirable content. The same holds true for numerous other short stories. In the future, similar stories will go through a clean-up and re-release.

For today, let's learn the details of when the aliens gave Dana her second baby. 

The Aliens Give Dana her Second Baby

It was New Year's Eve in 2010, a happy time for Dana and her husband Mike. Even Katie, their alien child who had been plagued with one developmental challenge after another, was finally coming around—mostly normal. She was merged into regular academic classes with her peers. Katie was fully adjusted to her ADHD medication, and receiving tutoring to help cope with her learning disabilities. Speech was nearly normal. As for wetting the bed, the episodes mostly cleared up.

As for Mike, he was getting older and his alcoholism and drug abuse was subsiding.  Things were becoming fairly normal for the family. The holiday season of 2010/2011 was a joyous time for Dana.

Then came New Years Eve. With the family on track to being normal for a change, they hosted a celebration in their home with a few dozen family and friends. Food and pastries were catered in. With it there was plenty of booze to be enjoyed by all, even Mike—he didn't actually quit drinking, just cut way back. At the stroke of midnight; Mike, his brothers and friends all went outside to light fireworks. People came outside on the deck to watch while toasting in the New Year. 

But it was the fireworks, Dana believed, that were responsible for calling the aliens back to reek more havoc in her life. At one point during the backyard fireworks display, a sky rocket took off for the sky. Apparently it was a dud. It never exploded or emitted brilliant showers of smoke. Instead, it took off higher and higher into the sky and eventually turned a brilliant green. The green light flickered and strobed in such a way that it momentarily reminded Dana of the alien spaceship from decades ago that signaled itself to her from the sky.

Dana froze in terror while observing the flickering sky rocket that never exploded. The green light strobed the exact, same pattern that Dana remembered from years ago. It was intelligible, and she knew its meaning. It meant that within a matter of hours, she would receive another unwelcomed visit from beings of another world.

"Ugghhhhh?????" Dana cried out with trembling lips. "Not again!"

"What are you talking about?" shouted her husband, Mike, from a distance. "That was the first dud for the evening."

People nearby laughed.

Dana nervously laughed with them. She certainly couldn't confess to being a victim of regular alien abductions. And it was the last time that Dana would laugh for the evening. Throughout the remainder of the party, she stayed mostly quiet. She was angry and very disappointed. Just when Dana was beginning to believe that the bizarre life of chronic alien abductions had ended, it looked like it was going to return.

"Is everything okay?" asked Dana's sister, Lisa, towards the end of the evening. Both were in the kitchen. Lisa was helping Dana clean up. And if you recall, Lisa was with Dana on that fateful night of her first alien abduction. The reader remembers the incident in the northern woods of Michigan?—yes?

"I think I'm just tired." answered Dana.

"It was the green firework, wasn't it?" suggested Lisa with a smile. "It reminded you of something."

Dana sighed. "I don't want to start with that right now."

"I'm sorry, Dana." apologized Lisa. "We're just having a little fun. Come-on, it's New Year's Eve..."

***

By one o'clock in the morning all the party guests had left. Katie was sound asleep. And Mike couldn't get into bed fast enough. Initially, Dana fell asleep once her head hit the pillow. She hoped that she would be too tired to wake up in the middle of the night. But, alas, shortly after falling asleep; Dana woke up and glanced over to the alarm clock on her nightstand. The time was 2:14 am.

Dana closed her eyes and laid there for about a minute or so. She was having difficulty falling back to sleep. Maybe if she tried the reverse; maybe if she tried laying in bed with her eyes open while staring at the ceiling and fighting the urge to fall asleep, this would solve the problem. She did this for some time, but could not feel her eyes growing heavy.

"Come-on..." thought Dana to herself. She glanced over to the alarm clock and was startled to see that it was still 2:14 am. 

Impossible! Twenty minutes must have passed. This "frozen time phenomenon" could mean only one thing. And just like every time before, the house was frighteningly silent. Even Mike's breathing could not be heard.

On this particular alien abduction, Dana didn't see any green lights shining through the bedroom window. Instead, the curtains rustled and the silhouette of a being could be seen from behind.

"No!" cried out Dana. "No! Please! Somebody wake up! Please, help me! Mike! Katie!" 

It was no use. All she could do was lay there under some sort of sleep paralysis, except she was wide awake.

Soon Dana floated through the bedroom window and onto the spaceship. As the ship drifted up to the sky, Dana was stripped of her pajamas and laid down onto an examining table with arms and legs restrained.

Where did the aliens go with Dana?

So strange: they whisked out to the Pacific Ocean, near Seattle, where the space ship hovered over the water. And as a couple of extra terrestrials began to probe and examine her body, Dana could sense that a large group of others were actually fishing through the windows of the space ship. Yes, you read that correctly! The aliens had fishing poles and lures. They were actually catching fish through the windows of their flying saucer!

And if you think that’s strange, the music of Led Zeppelin could be heard through some audio system on the space ship. Since when do extra terrestrials listen to Led Zeppelin?

The aliens seemed excited by their catch, and they began to discuss the merits of the fish. All the while, Dana felt a sense of confusion and disorientation, unsure of what the aliens planned to do with her."We've got something!" announced one of the aliens who were fishing.

"Well reel it in!" encouraged another alien.

The winding of the fishing reel could be heard. Soon all the aliens were excited.

"What is it?" asked one.

"It's a fish!" answered another.

"Well we knew that!" nearly shouted the boss. For some reason, Dana knew he was the one in charge. "I knew it was a fish. But what kind?"

"Oh, you know what this is?" began one of the aliens. "This is a red snapper!

"OOOOOOOOOO!" exclaimed all the aliens on board the space ship.

Suddenly, Dana felt every alien eye on her. "What? What are you going to do?" she pleaded, her voice trembling.

The alien who caught the fish held it up, its scales glinting under the ship’s strange lights. "This specimen is compatible," it announced, its voice echoing in her mind.

Before Dana could react, the aliens surrounded her, their instruments whirring and clicking. She felt a cold, tingling sensation as a device pressed against her abdomen, sending a jolt of energy through her body.

The fish was placed in a containment field beside her, its gills flaring as it floated in midair. The aliens began to scan both Dana and the fish, their voices overlapping in a chorus of incomprehensible analysis.

Dana’s vision blurred. She could feel something changing inside her—an alien presence, a foreign energy. Panic rose as she realized she was powerless, a specimen in an experiment she could not understand.

Outside, the strains of Led Zeppelin’s “Moby Dick” played, the drum solo pounding in time with her racing heart.

The last thing she saw before losing consciousness was the fish’s unblinking eye, staring at her through the glass.

***

Some weeks later, Dana learned that she was pregnant. But she had no idea what kind of creature was growing inside her. As usual, the aliens had performed some kind of experiment on her. This time she was carrying a mysterious, alien-related entity.

To be continued...

Church is for Hypocrites

Have you ever been in a situation in which someone makes the remark, "I don't know why anyone would want to go to church. Church is nothing but a bunch of hypocrites."? When hearing this, be sure to remark back, "Well then you should really go because you would fit in." It's the perfect comeback the next time someone says that about church. 

Really it's true. Church is made up of a bunch of hypocrites who can't act out what the church teaches. Each week we sit in church as a bunch of sinners. We are sinners on the road to recovery. In fact, just like an alcoholics at an AA meeting in which the first thing to do is admit that one is an alcoholic, we immediately confess that we are sinful and unclean in thought, word, deed, and the things we leave undone. 

Church is a place of healing and a place of cleaning up our act. And only when recognizing that Jesus is the means to repair ourselves and bring us to the state that God intended when creating us will we fully be on that road to recovery. Only then would we recognize that the kingdom of God is like finding a buried treasure in a field, so we sell everything we own to purchase that field.

The Aliens Give Dana Her First Baby

 Hello All:

At only fourteen-years old, Dana had a terrifying experience in the north woods of Michigan while vacationing with her family. During this time, Dana had been abducted by extraterrestrials. But the initial abduction was apparently useless to the aliens. Dana was too young to follow through with whatever plans the beings had for her. Eight years later, they returned while Dana was on a weekend getaway with her fiancé in Tomahawk, Wisconsin. The abduction was equally terrifying as the first time, not to mention very bizarre. Be sure to READ STORY ONE and READ STORY TWO in the series if you haven't done so already; or if you need to refresh your memory.

The Aliens Give Dana Her First Baby

Nearly a year after Dana had been abducted by aliens in Tomahawk, Wisconsin; she and her fiancé, Mike, married. She never told Mike of the terrifying and bizarre experience up at the cottage in Tomahawk, or of her first abduction as a young girl. How could she possibly explain it to her future husband? What's more, Dana feared possibly losing her fiancé if in the event that he thought she was crazy. And in those days, Dana sometimes believed that she was going crazy. She kept reminding herself of her father's words of wisdom that strange lights in the sky are usually satellites in space or military planes traveling at high altitude. She also reminded herself of a high school friend's advice that alien abductions are theorized to be only nightmares under sleep paralysis.

But this doesn't hold true for the present. Dana now believes beyond a shadow of a doubt that the alien abductions are and always have been 100% real. 

How can she not? Her teenage daughter, Katie, seems to have ways of reminding her of this. It's usually done in Katie's annoying choice of communicating with Mother.

"Katie, no!" shouts Dana to her teenage daughter. "You know how to talk! You can speak with words! And how am I supposed to know what you need by you tapping on my arm like that?" It's Katie's preferred choice of communicating with Mother which involves rhythmically tapping on her arm or shoulder with index, middle and ring finger. The taps are done at a high speed and recognizably in patterns. And it is much too similar to the way that the extraterrestrials communicate with Dana when she is onboard their ship. With their fingers, they touch Dana with various rhythmic patterns which place her body under a control. With this control, she obeys instructions to "walk over here", or "climb into this tank of slimy fluid". Not that the aliens don't have the ability to telepathically communicate these things to Dana; it's just that tapping patterns have a way of coaxing her against her will.

And this is one of the reasons why Dana secretly despises when Katie does this. Rather than ask for something, she uses the alien method of communication so that Mother obeys her wishes. "You speak with words, understand?" orders Dana to her daughter.

"Yes Mother..." finally answers Katie. But then she uses alien telepathy. "Why do you try to pretend not to know what that means? It's how they talk to us on the ship."

"Katie, what do you want?" asks Dana in an irritated tone of voice. "Now that you've interrupted me and have my attention..."

"I wanted to know if you could give me some money." finally reveals Katie. "I want to go to the mall with Jenny and Holly and shop for some clothes." Katie’s eyes are light brown with a somewhat hint of eeriness. If eyes are windows to the soul, then Katie's eyes might reveal that there is something not of this world about her. She's always been strange—actually one problem after another since she was born. Katie exhibited delayed speech development, and didn't start talking until kindergarten age. In school she demonstrated some serious learning disabilities along with behavioral disorders, hyperactivity and attention deficit disorder. She wet the bed until she was ten years old. Yes, Dana and Mike's first child was a real handful.

But, now, fifteen-years old, Katie is doing much better. It's just that Mother has to remind her to speak with words. "Yes, I will give you some money." answers Mother. "All you had to do was ask."

***

So how long did it take before Dana conceived her first child after marrying her husband, Mike? To answer, you have to understand that the pair of newlyweds decided to wait about five years before having children. They wanted to enjoy their lives together as newlyweds. Then, about the time when being newlyweds wouldn't be so new, they planned on finally having their first child.

But despite their plans, Dana and Mike didn't actually wait the entire five years to fulfill their newlywed existence. At about four and a half years into marriage, both decided that it was time. But month after month there was no sign of pregnancy. Two years passed before Mike finally asked, "Why aren't we conceiving a baby?"

"I don't know..." sadly answered Dana. She partly blamed herself. But she wouldn't dare provide her theory that maybe it had something to do with the alien abductions. Among many of the procedures onboard the extraterrestrial ship, Dana was subjected to intense activity which was aimed in harvesting her abundant energy. The extraterrestrials had a way of doing this, and they somehow fed off it.

And then there was the most-recent incident which was, by far, the most traumatizing. It involved some kind of implant that, as Dana felt, provided more mental control over her and probably allowed tracking of her location with ease.  She remembered laying there on the examination table with eyes closed. And then they fluttered open as she was met with a dull, throbbing pain in her head. She tried to sit up, but a wave of dizziness washed over her, forcing her back onto the table.

As she lay there, she felt a strange, tingling sensation in her scalp. It was as if something was moving under her skin, probing and exploring.

Suddenly, she felt a sharp pain in her forehead, and she saw a small, metallic object protruding from her skin. It was a tiny, cylindrical implant, no larger than a grain of rice.

Dana's eyes widened in horror as she realized that the implant was slowly being absorbed into her brain tissue. She felt a creeping sense of dread as she realized that she was no longer in control of her own body.

The implant began to glow with a soft, pulsing light, and Dana felt her mind being probed and explored. She saw visions of her past, her memories, and her deepest fears.

She tried to scream, but her voice was muffled and distant. She was trapped in her own body, unable to escape the alien's invasive presence.

As the implant continued to glow, Dana felt her consciousness being slowly drained away. She was being assimilated, absorbed into the alien's collective.

This was the only thing on her mind at the present moment as Dana and Mike discussed their inability to conceive. Were the aliens causing this? "Maybe we should see a fertility doctor." suggested Dana. "Maybe we need to get ourselves checked out."

***

It was discovered after medical testing that Mike had a low sperm count. He drank heavily, smoked cigarettes, and used more than his share of recreational marijuana. And there were the occasional incidents of using psychedelics such psilocybin and LSD. Once Mike actually tripped on peyote—cactus buttons, or mescaline as some people refer to it as. These things, as the doctor explained, can all contribute to a reduction in sperm count.

"You need to change your lifestyle." advised the doctor. "You really shouldn't be smoking. You should have no more than two alcoholic beverages a day and the drug use needs to stop!"

Mike sighed and hesitated for a few seconds.

"Mike, I want children!" declared Dana. "Just do it for us... Do it for our baby and any of our future children."

"Alright, fine!" exploded Mike. "I'll cut the drug use, and I'll cut back on my drinking. But I'm not sure about the smoking. That's hard to do. I like to smoke." Then he asked the doctor, "Do you think that cutting back on my drinking and quitting the recreational drugs will help?"

"It certainly will." encouraged the doctor. "It's a start."

And so Mike did as promised. But many months passed, and Dana had yet to be impregnated.

"Maybe God is just waiting to send us the right baby." suggested Dana. "I've heard of that before. "People try for some years and almost give up. Then, they are finally given a baby."

For Mike it was as good as an explanation as any.

***

So how long did Dana need to wait before conceiving her first child?

Oh, it was certainly a test of patience! She was married to Mike in 1987, waited four-and-a-half years before trying for a child, and then waited nearly nine years later before discovering that she was finally pregnant!

It was the mid-summer of 2000 when Dana suspected that the magic moment had finally taken place. On a Sunday afternoon, Mike pulled his Ford F-250 pickup truck into a forest preserve that was located about an hour away from where they lived. It was to be an afternoon of fishing at a secret pond that was hidden in the forest. Very few fishermen in the area knew of the pond, and Mike was one of the fortunate people to have heard about it.

"I don't know about this place." stated Dana as Mike drove some distance into the forest preserve parking lot. "It's too secluded, and the trees look old and gnarly. It looks dangerous; probably a lot of crime committed here."

"Dana, I'm telling you. There's supposed to be some really good fishing at that hidden pond. Just relax... you're with me. We'll be alright."

The pond that Mike and Dana soon hiked to with picnic basket, blanket and fishing gear was actually connected to a large lake via a creek. The fish apparently swam up and down this creek.

Now about this hidden pond: It has an urban legend along with an unofficial name of "the friendly fort". This so-called "friendly fort" was a hidden pond that a bizarre UFO cult often gathered around in the midnight hours to perform strange new age—almost witchcraft—rituals. The cult could be considered a space-aged coven of cosmic witches that use the small pond to merge their consciousness into while summoning and conjuring deities from faraway galaxies or higher dimensions. And it probably wasn't the best place for someone like Dana to visit who is regularly abducted by aliens throughout her adult life.

The "friendly fort" is surrounded by a three-tiered coliseum of flagstone which is a complete mystery to those who live in the area. There are no records of the forest preserve district ever making such an improvement around the pond. It was further evidence that the bizarre UFO cult had done this themselves. You see; they gather around the pond in a large circle on this three-tiered coliseum of flagstone while performing their space aged magic and conjuring their intergalactic deities.

"Oh this is a nice spot, here!" exclaimed Mike while crossing a large log which connected to a flagstone platform out in the water. The platform was large enough to accommodate their fishing gear, picnic basket with blanket while allowing adequate space to move about.

But Dana did not like the platform. "Mike I don't know." she complained. "Are you sure about this? I feel like we are not supposed to be here."

"Why aren't we supposed to be here?" challenged Mike. "This is a public forest preserve, and fishing is allowed in these waters provided we have a permit." Mike reached into his tackle box and pulled out his fishing permit. "See... we'll be fine."

Mike didn't understand the things that Dana was experiencing. You see, that stone platform was no ordinary platform. It was the very center of the friendly fort, and was designated by the space-aged coven as the Altar of Water. At that very altar, the high priest and priestess regularly conjured up deities from faraway galaxies.

Mike removed the lid from the Styrofoam container of night crawlers and pulled out a worm. With a small knife he cut the worm into fourths. While doing this, he happened to glance over to his wife, Dana, who covered her ears and closed her eyes—seemingly in agony.

"What? What's wrong?" asked Mike.

"The worm is screaming." answered Dana.

"Screaming?" challenged Mike. "I don't hear the worm screaming! That's impossible! Worms don't have vocal cords to make sounds.”

"It's hissing." explained Dana. "It's hard to explain. The worm is generating this high-pitched vibration because it's in pain, and I can hear it."

Mike only shook his head in disbelief. "Worms don't feel pain. They don't have a complex nervous system like other animals. And you've been getting stranger and stranger in the years that we've been married."

Mike's remark of being strange actually hurt Dana's feelings. She never shared with him the ongoing alien abductions that she had been experiencing in all those years. Dana believed that the aliens were doing something to her to cause all of the extraordinary perceptions along with bizarre memories. She sometimes spent many days in a state of depersonalization while questioning reality and existence. And then there was her recent suspicion of being being implanted with something by the aliens—some sort of communication or tracking device.

"Well, once I whip this bobber out in the water I'll have a few tokes so I can catch up with you." announced Mike. Yes, in the past couple of years, Mike had resumed his recreational use of marijuana. To him, conceiving a baby was a lost cause. With the bobber finally floating on water, he reached into the tackle box for his already packed bowl and lighter. "You want some?" Mike offered Dana.

"No..."

"What's wrong?" asked Mike. He sensed that something bothered Dana.

But Dana wouldn't confess to what hurt her feelings. "Nothing..." she answered. "I just can't do stuff like that. Our company has random drug testing."

Mike merely shrugged his shoulders and took another hit of weed while gazing out at the bobber floating in water. For being a pond that offered such great fishing, one would think that Mike would use lures to do some casting.

One of the night crawlers spoke from inside the Styrofoam container. He warned Mike, "You will pay severely for your unconscionable deed." Seconds later the surroundings suddenly turned very quiet in that moment for Dana. It's not like she couldn't hear anything. And it's not like the world around her froze. She could still hear her husband drawing in puffs of marijuana smoke and choking. She could see the bobber floating up and down on the water. But it was suddenly as-if she were experiencing these things through a television screen. Rather than be part of whatever was taking place, she was a now a silent observer who watched herself from a distant place.

Then came a tremendous wind from across the pond with deafening explosion. It didn't seem to faze Mike in the least. The wind didn't even affect the flame on the lighter as it torched the marijuana in Mike's bowl. But Dana was aware of it. The wind was so strong that she fought for dear life and called out for help. But Mike did not hear her.

Too weak to continue fighting, Dana had been blown into the pond where she sank under the water. She couldn't even swim; just kept sinking and sinking down to the bottom.

"Don't worry about breathing." reassured a familiar voice inside Dana's head. It was one of the extraterrestrials who, just as usual, telepathically communicated with her. "Keep your eyes closed." the extraterrestrial urged. "Do not open your eyes." And don't worry about breathing. The liquid in this tank has the ability to penetrate the pores of your skin and deliver oxygen."

It was difficult for Dana to relax. She wondered what happened to her. Just moments ago she was sitting on the stone platform with Mike. Now, from what the voice of an alien told her, she was inside a tank of some mysterious liquid. She was obviously onboard another spaceship.

But then Dana found herself sitting cross-legged on the hardwood floor of what appeared to be an old grammar school classroom. She was with a dozen people of various ages who all sat in a circle. Lying on the floor before each one of them was a small stack of cards with the letters A through G.

"Now shuffle the cards up." a voice ordered from behind Dana.

As the other people in the circle shuffled their cards with letters on them, Dana did the same. She speculated that perhaps everyone sitting on the hardwood floor of that old grammar school classroom were abductees just like her. They might have been in different areas of the alien spaceship and undergoing similar procedures like Dana.

"When I say go; everyone line their cards up in order—the letter, A, closest to you, and G at the center of the circle." instructed the voice from behind Dana. "Go!"

Dana quickly lay out each card in a place where she estimated it would sit in its correct order. In less than ten seconds, she had all the cards laid out. Everyone else in the circle had the same.

"Very good, everyone!" congratulated the voice from behind.

Dana looked over to the person next to her. It was a young woman in her late twenties. "Where are we?" Dana whispered to her?

The young woman shrugged her shoulders. "I guess this is part of whatever procedures they do?" Apparently, Dana's speculation was correct. Everyone in that circle was onboard the alien spaceship, and now participating in some group activity.

"Everyone, I have an announcement to make." said the voice from behind Dana. "We have Dana with us today, and Dana has been trying to conceive a child for a number of years. We can make that happen for her."

Dana looked around at everyone in the circle. They all smiled.

The young woman next to Dana whispered, "I guess today is your turn."

The voice from behind Dana instructed. "Bring your face down to the floor and whisper, 'paramecium'".

Dana did as directed and whispered, "paramecium" with her face near the floor.

"Go ahead." encouraged the voice. "Do it again."

"Paramecium..." whispered Dana.

Suddenly, Dana was back in the tank of fluid. 

"Keep your eyes closed, and don't worry about breathing." instructed the telepathic voice of the extraterrestrial.

"How much longer?" asked Dana.

"Where almost done." reassured the extraterrestrial. "Now keep whispering, 'paramecium'."

In her mind, Dana observed herself on the hardwood floor of the old grammar school classroom with the group of other abductees. With face near the floor she whispered, "Paramecium..."

But inside the tank of mysterious liquid, Dana was suddenly aware of a jumbo-sized paramecium swimming close to her. And when I say jumbo, I mean jumbo! A paramecium, in case you are unaware, is a one-celled microscopic orgasm about 300 micrometers in size that can often be found in bodies of water. They are characterized as having an elongated shape with countless cilia (moving hairs) that surround its body to assist with mobility. Again, these are typically about 300 micrometers in length. But the paramecium that swam in the tank with Dana was six inches long!

There is something else that soon terrified Dana. Dana was fully undressed in that tank of mysterious liquid. And the paramecium "swam" its way over towards Dana.

Although Dana had her eyes closed in the tank of liquid, she was fully aware of the jumbo paramecium along with the fact that it swam close to her. And then it touched her!

"No!" cried Dana in her mind. She began to squirm around to avoid the jumbo paramecium making contact.

But then the extraterrestrial outside the tank reached its arm into the tank, and touched Dana's shoulder with its fingers. It made rhythmic tapping which rendered Dana powerless. All she could do was lay in the tank of liquid and allow the jumbo paramecium to do what it wished.

This isn't right!" telepathically cried out Dana.

"Just relax and try not to worry." reassured the extraterrestrial. "You should be happy. For today is the day that you will conceive a star child. You will have a daughter. We've modified the paramecium in such a way that it will deliver DNA of both humans and of beings from our world."

"But what will my baby look like?" asked Dana with a note of worry. Will it be normal?

"It will look just like any ordinary human." explained the extraterrestrial. "Except it will additionally contain DNA from our world."

A few minutes passed, and the jumbo paramecium finally finished.

"Congratulations!" telepathically announced the extraterrestrial. "You have been successfully impregnated. You will give birth to star child—a daughter.”

The next thing Dana remembered was grabbing onto Mike's arm as he pulled her back onto the stone platform. He was laughing. "Jeez! It's only a fish!"

Soaking wet, Dana pushed herself onto the cement platform and then stood up. She felt for her pulse and then looked around just to gauge if she was truly experiencing normal reality.

"Are you alright?" asked Mike.

"Yeah, what happened?" asked Dana.

"I pulled a bluegill out of the water, and you jumped into the pond. Have you ever been fishing before?"

Poor Dana; just as always, how could she even begin to explain the bizarre ordeal that she had experienced?

***

One month following the incident in the forest, Dana learned that she was pregnant. And as Dana would come to find out after Katie had been born, her star child was truly from someplace else.

To be continued...