Wednesday, December 18, 2013

White Hole

 White Hole



White hole: the theoretical posterior of a black hole—the discharging end of where one universe's devoured cosmic energy and matter is ejected into a new universe. Some scientists theorize that a black hole is a collapsing or imploding star that began its new existence by grabbing onto nearby mass and energy. The end result is an eternal implosion that gets larger and larger. White holes are a feasible theory when considering the mystery of where all that devoured matter and energy goes. It has sometimes been theorized that our own universe was created by a star in another universe that died out, imploded and fed life into our own by delivering astronomical amounts of mass and energy through the receiving end of the black hole; the white hole.

I woke up this morning not looking forward to facing the day. The previous evening I learned that because of a minor flaw in financing, one of my real estate buyers would be unable to close on a listing of mine. Worse yet, this created a domino effect that killed a double whammy transaction. The buyer was supposed to purchase a listing of mine, and the sellers of mine were supposed to purchase another home I had sold them. Losing the sale was only half of the grief. I also felt guilty because three couples—possibly four—had learned that they were not going to close. I believed that I was the one who was supposed to make things happen for these people. Imagine waking up one morning with such horrible thoughts of guilt before even putting your feet on the floor.

In further frustration and hopelessness, I began to beat myself down while reminding myself that for a couple months I hadn't seen a sale. Was real estate the job for me? Then, just as I rolled over to push myself out of bed, I glanced at the floor and noticed a Christmas ornament that had somehow fallen from the tree months ago, and ended up near my bed. It had about a dozen braids of gold that when hung as a decoration would look like a golden icicle. The way it laid there, it reminded me of an ancient statue called the Hindu Dance of Creation. This suggestion catapulted me into speculating the different theories of how the universe was constructed which did give me some sort of relief from the despair I was feeling.

Suddenly, I remembered a dream from the previous night in which I was way out in space and observed an enormous hole radiating the most beautiful, brilliant, white light I had ever seen. It was likened to being a tiny bug in a swimming pool that observed the jet end of water shooting out of a pool filter. I could actually see the light as bubbling mass that ran out like water and flowed all over the cosmos.

That's when it hit me! Inside of me was a black hole that consumed all of my energy. It definitely felt like a dying star. But there had to be receiving end to the black hole, right? With this speculation in mind, I declared that every time a real estate deal fell apart, or my luck seemed to be down; I would become a white hole in space that radiates light and energy comparable to trillions of suns. New life... New Energy... A NEW UNIVERSE INSIDE OF ME!

I sprang up (but was careful not to wake the wife) and went to the kitchen to make coffee. "Look at all that mass and energy converting grinded beans into coffee!"

I poured milk into my cup and was amazed, "Look at the gravity pulling the mass out of this milk jug!"

Only moments ago I was careful not to wake my wife while getting out of bed. But now I had to wake her just to show her the wonderful phenomenon.

"Honey, wake up! Look!"

She looked confused and concerned as to why I woke her up.

"This milk jug represents an entire universe of mass and energy trapped in a black hole. The gravity on the outside is like a white hole when I tip the jug over and pour the milk into the glass! See how the milk jug is a beautiful white hole in space, radiating an astronomical amount of mass and energy!"

She nearly smacked me on the head. "You woke me up for that?"

***

Later that day I visited a potential client to present a market evaluation. The husband and wife wished to sell their home and were curious of its market price. But why not sneak in a little sales presentation along with it? Among the items used for this presentation were a few small containers of milk. This was going to be a new tactic that I called "White Hole Marketing". It would bring new life into my usual, boring sales pitches.

"So what are you going to do when your home has been for sale for a long time?”It's priced right, and you're getting all the exposure with no offers? Are you going to feel down? What are you going to do when you are a few weeks from closing and find out that the buyer lost his job and can't close on your home? Are you going to fall into despair? No you are not! You will become the receiving end of a black hole way out in space. You will be like a white hole radiating new energy comparable to trillions of suns. See this small container of milk? This container represents you; an entire universe! The milk represents all your hopes and dreams. But what do you do when your hopes and dreams are smashed to pieces like me throwing the container of milk on the floor and jumping on it like this..."

I threw the container of milk on the floor and jumped on it which made the container explode and spray milk out all over the kitchen. I grabbed another and another and repeated so the seller would get the idea, "See... you are a beautiful white hole in space... THIS IS HOW WE SELL YOUR HOME!!!"

Suddenly, the husband leapt out of his seat as if struck by sublime motivation. But what was this? His choice of words was most unexpected. "Alright, you can leave! Get out of here before we call the police! Does your broker know you do this?"

I didn't let the rejection get me down. I figured my energy was too intense for the sellers, and they were not ready for a Realtor of such magnitude. I drove off and couldn't wait to meet the next seller or buyer with my "White Hole Marketing" presentation.

Early in the evening I watched a news story on TV that reported plans were being made to launch the first manned mission to Mars in the next couple decades. I thought about what a perfect opportunity it would be to seek out new, prime real estate on Mars. From that moment, on, I decided to become the first Re/Max agent to land the Re/Max balloon on Mars. I formulated the future advertisement in my head, "When the first human foot touches the soil of Mars, Re/Max will be there, scouting out prime real estate for residential and commercial needs. Why not list your home with an agent who is going places?"

***

And that's what selling homes is all about. You've got to be a source of energy and new ideas for your buyers and sellers. You've got to think and act quickly. You've got to be cutting edge, and you have to realize that for every opportunity, there is an obstacle; and for every obstacle, there is a new opportunity.